I got to see my dogs this weekend!!!! And also some other family and friends :) My spirits are high, but there's lots to attribute that to besides treatment.
My boyfriend went with me to treatment today. It was the first time I'd had someone watching who could tell me everything about what I look like from the outside. Only this wasn't the kind of thing that interests him much. If I were observing, I would study the machine intently and ask lots of questions about the display (I know there is one because the doctor can always tell me how much time I have left, but I can't see it when I'm in the chair and it isn't on when I'm out of it). Instead, he sat quietly with his ear plugs in. His only comment afterwards was, "I'm glad I brought a book. It was loud and boring." Oh, well.
Even after the boyfriend left and I was back to my lonelier alternate reality, I still felt good. I didn't feel especially tempted to hop into the car with him and just head home because I now know this is working. It's working big time, and I don't want to miss a dose. If anything, I'm getting scared to go home because I don't trust yet that I will continue to do well after the treatment ends. What if I need it everyday to feel this way? Perhaps Wal-Mart will have a home version on their shelves soon.
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ReplyDeleteUpon re-reading, I realized that my boyfriend sounded disinterested in my treatment in this post. To clarify, he has been INCREDIBLY supportive of my journey. He's my biggest cheerleader. It was just a little boring for him to watch me sit in a chair. I can see how it wouldn't be very exciting to watch.
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